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Plastic Patrick

May 6, 2013






Stuart Carruthers was born in England, where I lived until 2005 when I decided to sell everything and move to Taiwan because “no one I know has ever been there”. Several years later I married and had two children. With two small children, my time for hobbies is limited, so right now I just use my time to write.

Plastic Patrick

I’ve forgotten what it was like to be made of flesh and bone. I used to be. Everyone used to be. But by the time it happened to me it was ‘normal’ and almost a rite of passage. In the early days, once the fear and panic had subsided, people even held plastic parties. That was 80 years ago.

What caused it? Well today we know, but it took many years find out. It began in the old Irish communities around the world. Places like New York and Boston were the first to succumb. A few days after one St Patrick’s Day, reports started coming in of people not being able to taste things and their mouths feeling furry. Initially it was put down to bad Guinness or the green dye they used to make it fun, but it spread beyond their mouths and soon they struggled to breath and they were hospitalized and locked up in secure wards. They were the unlucky ones; they were prodded, probed and dissected to find out what was happening. The real figures never came out but it’s believed that many thousands of victims were killed and dissected to discover the cause.

As the contagion spread, and the rest of the country came down with similar symptoms, the panic really started. Within 30 days those initial victims, who’d been hospitalized when their plasticization became more obvious, were completely transformed and had the glossy sheen that today we consider normal. But, as it became apparent that these people weren’t dying and that the numbers of affected spread into the millions around the country the panic subsided and they were treated with suspicion and fear and rounded up into camps as the authorities tried to contain the spread.

Within three years 50 percent of the population was affected and the camps had been closed down still no one knew the cause and it had by then gone around the world. And then, the first plastic baby was born, kicking and screaming it looked normal except for its plastic sheen. It soon became a case of them and us: the Plastics who were immortal and only ate seaweed and the Fleshes who still consumed the contents of the planet.

Within another three years the last person became plastic. There were no more flesh babies being born and most people had forgotten about the cause. When the scientists and politicians and become plastic the incentive to do anything about it had waned and now, as you know, we’re all plastic.

But one last thing before we go our separate ways:

One day, out of the blue an advert was placed on social networking sites and worlds’ newspapers that claimed responsibility. Its message was a simple one “Now you’re all plastic, you fake Oirish. Signed Plastic Patrick.”


Book Cover - C


Extraordinary Dreams of an Ireland Traveler

Rosemary “Mamie” Adkins


Please watch for my new book Reflections of Mamie-A Story of Survival to launch in June 2013.


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  1. Stuart, Stuart, Stuart – a fascinating story teller ye are! Just caught on to your work recently and will always come back for more. Your short stories are complete works in themselves with a rare talent for the precis.. What better place to show up then on well visited blogsites such as Extraordinary Ireland! Best of luck and I look forward to more!

  2. Thank you Linda. Stuart is another rare find and I loved his generous compassion just showing up to help. We do indeed hope he returns as the others we have been luky enough to have here.


  3. Raani York permalink

    What a great blog post, Mamie. Thank you for sharing this with us. I enjoyed reading it very much. You are so talented!!
    Sending you Hugs!!

  4. Hi Raani,

    This and the others are going to be difficult to top and this week, it’s my turn! I have been so lucky to have my friends write post for my blogs. Maybe you should consider-I bet you have been in Ireland or maybe Jake?? Thank you for the visit,

  5. Jon Magee permalink

    I was thinking of the song of the 1960’s “Substitute” with the lyrics “I was born with a PLASTIC spoon in my mouth”

    Stuart, thank you for sharing this with us, I look forward to reading more of your work.

  6. The 60’s gave us all so many songs to identify with-yes, it would be nice to read what he and others have to say! Thank you Jon for your comment and Stuart for visiting.

  7. Thank you, Rosemary and Stuart! It is always wonderful to gather insight into a writer’s world and grand to read such great stories. Stuart, you are quite the story teller! Most enjoyable read 🙂 Rosie, something went amiss in the last paragraph. You left us hanging with an incomplete sentence! I guess this was intentional to keep us guessing and thirsty for more! LOL 🙂

  8. I saw the hanging sentence but thought it was intentional on such a clever writer as Stuart!

    I hope he will knw he can come and reply. I have been so lucky with my guests.


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